A one-two right to the kisser.
"I am going to save you both. AND THEN I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
— Agatha Heterodyne to her beaux, Girl Genius
In Slap-Slap-Kiss, two people fighting, physically or verbally, segues into two people kissing, making out, or even having sex. This trope is the reverse of that, where two people kissing turns into two people fighting or having an argument.
This was a once very popular trope in The Western and similar films, where the rogue protagonist has been away for a long time and returns to his old flame. She is initially delighted to see him after such a long time and falls into his embrace and smooches him, but then her mind says, "Hey, this is the bastard that left for 10 years, dammit!" and gives him a wallop with a proclamation like "You beast!"
Then there's the case when only one person is a willing participant A in a kiss and they end up on the end of the unwilling person B's fist — usually A is a man and B is a woman because of they Wouldn't Hit a Girl and A Man Is Always Eager (for kissing or otherwise).
A variation on this trope is that the kisser thought the kissee had been killed. Expect a line to the effect of, "How dare you make me worry like that!"
It is less common these days, but it does show up from time to time. Sometimes combined with Slap-Slap-Kiss to get a sort of Slap Slap Kiss Kiss Slap Slap effect.
See also: Destructo-Nookie, Love at First Punch.
Examples
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Anime and Manga
- In FAKE, Ryo reacts to being tricked into locking lips with Berkeley with a punch to the face. This serves to illustrate his growing feelings for Dee, since, as Ryo later reflects, he's never felt the impulse to lash out when Dee kisses him.
- Noir: Lady Silvana (a.k.a. the Intoccabile) gives Mireille a lengthy Kiss of Death, whereupon the latter tries to punch her.
- In Peach Girl after Kairi kisses Momo he goes in for a second kiss but she knees him in the groin.
- Ranma ½: When Ranma kisses Akane while under the Nekoken, she's stunned at first, but then launches him through the air and into the pool. And since Status Quo Is God, he's unable to even remember what happened and the whole experience doesn't change their relationship one bit.
- Lum from Urusei Yatsura. She's very affectionate to her 'Darling', but doesn't hesitate to zap him with lightning whenever he hits on another girl, which happens a lot.
- A literal case of this trope appeared in Servant × Service. Chihaya tells Ichimiya that she can't verbally convey her feelings. So, she kisses him, then gives him a hard slap to the face—the latter for her excessively Nice Guy attitude making him look of having no backbone at all.
Comic Books
- The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck, "The Prisoner of White Agony Creek": Goldie kisses Scrooge and then punches him across the room. The two tear the cabin apart brawling. Then everything goes quiet before a series of shots of the cabin as the sun moves across the sky...
Fan Works
- In A Taste of the Good Life, when Main Course tries to help Scootaloo escape from the boutique and stop her mother Ebby from following her, Ebby distracts him with a kiss before punching him in the gut, apologising, and running out the door.
- In Thousand Shinji, right after killing Gaghiel, Asuka kissed Shinji. And then she slapped him because he’d spend hours provoking her intentionally.
- Rocketship Voyager. After suggesting they should settle down on a planet and make babies instead of making a likely futile attempt to return to Earth, Chakotay plants a kiss on Captain Janeway and gets a slap in response. Then General Quarters sounds and they both have other things to worry about.
Film — Live-Action
- In the Clint Eastwood vehicle Absolute Power (1997), the President of the United States (Gene Hackman) is cavorting with a young hottie played by Melora Hardin. He slaps her in an apparent desire to make the sex more kinky. She takes it badly and hits him in the face. Things get very violent from there.
- Aline does this to Edward in Uwe Boll's Alone in the Dark (2005), although it was more of a Hug Hug Haymaker.
- Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005), though it has the "Slap Slap Kiss Kiss Slap Slap Bang Bang" variant.
- In the bizarre, 1970s porno-comedy Please Don't Eat My Mother a couple finishes having sex and have a discussion that turns into an argument that ends with the woman shooting and killing the man. The shooting happens no more than two minutes after the sex ends.
- Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, with a "Kiss Kiss Leave-Handcuffed-To-A-Mast-To-Get-Eaten-By-A-Kraken" twist.
- Parodied in Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, where Dewey and Darlene can't express physical affection without violence that escalates to comic extremes, such as Darlene kneeing Dewey in the balls during a makeout session.
- Averted in the Errol Flynn movie Gentleman Jim; when Jim Corbett kisses Vicki Ware (thinking she wanted him to), Vicki gets angry and tries to slap him, but Jim is too quick for her.
Literature
- In the Doctor Who New Adventures novels, Benny has been known to greet her [ex]-husband Jason with a "Summerfield combo," which apparently involves "a two-minute French kiss immediately followed by a straight left to the jaw."
- Tara and Gahan in Chessmen of Mars, at first.
- Twilight uses this in one of the books as Bella breaks her hand punching Jacob after they kiss. Justified, since the kiss was most definitely nonconsensual on her part.
- In Gone with the Wind, Rhett rescues Scarlett out of the burning Atlanta, then abandons her to go fight in the Confederate Army. Before leaving, he kisses her; she enjoys it, but then gets mad and slaps him.
- A more literal example in Christopher Moore's Bite Me: Abby Normal slaps her boyfriend Steven AKA "Foo Dog" after kissing him so he doesn't think she's a slut. She does this every time she kisses him.
- After their Slap-Slap-Kiss in Book 3, Amy and Ian do this in The 39 Clues.
- A variant from the X-Wing Series novel Solo Command: Donos likes Lara, and Lara likes Donos, but she's hesitant about getting close because he doesn't know that when she was one of the bad guys, she caused his squadron to get wiped out, causing major Heroic BSoD. Still, they kiss — and then he screws up by telling her "That's more like it."
Lara: Thanks for reminding me what a gasbag of ego you are.
Live Action TV
- Quite a few kisses on Farscape end like this.
- Star Trek: Deep Space Nine pulls one between Commander Sisko and the Mirror Universe Jadzia Dax in "Through the Looking Glass". In "Shattered Mirror", this is (possibly) spoofed; when Sisko returns, both Mirror Dax and Mirror Bashir engage in Slap Slap without Kiss for tricking them into believing he was "their" Sisko in "Looking Glass".
- Star Trek: Voyager. In "Blood Fever" B'Elanna Torres has to Mate or Die with Tom Paris, who starts out by gently kissing her. B'Elanna is a Human-Klingon hybrid however, a species famous for their Destructo-Nookie. She suddenly throws Tom to the ground and demands to know what he's doing.
PARIS: Enjoying myself?TORRES: Then show it!(Tom gets the idea and starts wrestling with her)
- Abbey Bartlet and her husband President Jed Bartlet do this in The West Wing episode "And It's Surely To Their Credit," when Abbey and Jed are finally able to have sex again following an attempted assassination that left Jed wounded, but before they do, Jed makes an insensitive comment about a feminist cause that Abbey holds dear.
- In The X-Files episode "Triangle" Mulder kisses a past version of Scully, who responds not by slapping him, but by pulling back her right fist and slugging him hard in the face. His response? "I was expecting a left."
- Both this trope and Slap-Slap-Kiss were parodied in the first episode of 3rd Rock from the Sun where after a confusing encounter and a "desire to groom you," Dick thought that if somebody else initiated a kiss, you were supposed to slap them.
- In the Doctor Who episode "The Crimson Horror", Jenny Flint finds the Doctor chained up in an attic after he'd been poisoned with a substance that left him barely mobile and mute beyond making "aaah"-noises for weeks. She finds a way to cure him, which makes him so unspeakably happy he dances up and down a corridor, then dips her and snogs her full on the mouth. Problem is, Jenny is 1) a lesbian and 2) married. As soon as he pulls her back onto her feet, she smacks him across the face.
- Torchwood has it between Captain Jack and Captain John in the episode "Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang". To be specific, it was a Kiss Kiss Punch Bar Brawl.
- Jack Harkness loves this trope. While searching for the Doctor/waiting for him to turn up in the 19th century, Torchwood overheard him yelling "I'M GOING TO KISS HIM, AND THEN I'M GOING TO KILL HIM".
- The second season finale of Leverage has this between Nate and Sophie. Nate gets Sophie to come back from her "hiatus" and the con ends up getting so complicated that Nate has to get himself arrested by the feds so the rest of the team can escape. Sophie isn't happy.
- In "Once More With Feeling" Spike decides that he will first save Buffy then he'll kill her.
- In Lost, Sawyer gets a kiss from Kate only to then reveal to her that he doesn't have the meds. So she punches him.
- A strange variant in Chuck: After being fired by the CIA and screwing up his relationship with Sarah in the Time Skip between seasons 2 and 3, Chuck jeopardizes a mission by showing up to help. In order to preserve her cover, Sarah orders Chuck to kiss her. He does, and then she slaps him so hard it puts him on the floor. She tells the mark she is there on a date with that Chuck was her ex that couldn't let go, thus invoking this trope.
- Dollhouse. Having found out she's a Tomato in the Mirror programmed by Topher, Dr Saunders tries to seduce him, thinking this is why he created her.
(kissing him) "I love you. I love you." (Topher shoves her away and gets his face slapped) "Why shouldn't I love you? Aren't you lovable?! Aren't you Big Brother? Aren't you the Lord my God?! Why should I fight your divine plan?"
Theater
- In the musical Annie Get Your Gun, Annie and Frank meet after several months traveling with different shows and spend several minutes declaring their undying love for each other… then it all goes downhill when Frank tries to give her his own medals and Annie rejects them. Frank accuses her of getting all high and mighty and they begin to argue, segueing into the song "Anything You Can Do (I Can Do Better)".
- Happens in Guys and Dolls at the climax of Sky and Sarah's early duet "I'll Know," where Sky gives Sarah a kiss and waits for her to return it — which she does by taking a whack at his cheek.
Sky: I'll drop in again in case you want to take a crack at the other cheek.
Video Games
- In Disgaea 2, Rozalin apparently feels that the best way of thanking Adell for pulling her psyche from the clutches of her Superpowered Evil Side is by trying to shoot him in the face. Though, to be fair, if you woke up from a BSOD to find the Hero trying to eat your face, you'd probably freak out too.
- The ending of Final Fantasy IX had a "Hug Hug Slap": Garnet ran to Zidane upon his dramatic reveal and happily embraced him, then beat on his chest angrily, because she thought he had died.
- Implied with Sheridan and Kendra in the Neverwinter Nights 2 community module Dark Waters (she was engaged to another guy at the time).
- The player character's kiss with Bastila in Knights of the Old Republic is immediately followed by her return to her earlier emotionally-distant attitude.
Web Comics
- In the Order of the Stick-inspired webcomic Anti-Heroes, Keriss and Aldran have a classic Kiss Kiss Slap leading into a How Dare You Die on Me! moment in this comic.
- Schlock Mercenary has it here, in its "only one is willing" form. Gender flipped as the man is the unwilling participant for once.
- In Seekers, Takchi turns a sweet moment of bonding (with a great Almost Kiss into a painful experience for himself. But that's what happens when you cop a feel.
- In Super Temps Skull Girl does this to Hydromancer because she's not sure if she should kiss him or slap him as a proper super-villainess. So she kisses him and then slaps him to cover all her bases.
- This Barfield Loses His Lunch strip, quite literally.
- Tripping Over You: Milo makes an Anguished Declaration of Love to Liam in a public restroom, which leads to a "kiss, kiss, ill-advised joke about Liam's Raging Stiffie, sucker-punch to Milo's eye" incident. It does lead to a Relationship Upgrade in the following chapter, but the black eye he gives Milo comes back to haunt Liam more than once.
- In Girl Genius, when Agatha learns that Gil and Tarvek, who are dying of Hogfarb's Resplendant Immolation, have taken stupid risks with their joint life support system in order to help her, as seen in the page quote
- In Bomango, Andy and Gogo kiss. After some awkward silence, Andy tells Gogo that her breath tastes like onions and old gym socks. She slaps him and calls him a jerkwad.
Web Original
- At the finale of Cracked.com's "Agents of Cracked" series, Mike and Dan kiss, then Dan pushes him away as though disgusted. Turns out otherwise.
Western Animation
- In one episode of the X-Men: The Animated Series cartoon, Rogue comes back from a dangerous mission and the following dialogue ensues between her and Gambit:
Gambit: I guess this means you missed me, huh? (Rogue places her gloved hand over Gambit's mouth and kisses him.)Rogue: I hate you.Gambit: I don't understand this woman.
- Avatar: The Last Airbender: Zuko and Mai, in their final scene (and one of the cutest of the entire series). They reunite and kiss, and then Mai pokes a finger into his chest and warns him never to break up with her again. Zuko then gives a nervous grin as if to say, "Sorry, don't hurt me!"
- The Secret Show: While they don't necessarily kiss first, Changed Daily and Lucy Woo do follow this trope somewhat. In her first and only appearance, Lucy Woo initially appears ecstatic to see her former partner again but then proceeds to yell at him for leaving her with Hamster Man for 20 years, all because he misread instructions she wrote on a photo she left behind for him to go save her.
- Teen Titans: This is how Starfire and Robin met. Robin was trying to help her out of her cuffs in an effort to show that he's friendly, and she responds by grabbing him into a kiss - before she shoves him into the ground, telling him to leave her alone if he doesn't want his world destroyed, before flying off.
- Bob's Burgers: In the episode "Bob Actually", Louise kisses Regular-Sized Rudy, then slaps him and threatens to end him if he tells anyone about it.
